The Blind eats many a Flye: OR, The Broken Damsel made Whole. The Tune of, My Father gave me a House and Land.
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OF late there was a Damsel mild,
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as I have heard for certain,
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To London went being with Child,
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and there to try her fortune:
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Where soon she had a Master got,
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with whom she was well pleased;
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A Widdower old and rich, God wot,
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whereby her Joys encreased:
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For I have heard it spoken plain,
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if that a Girl be undone,
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She quickly is made whole again
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if she goes up to London.
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This Girl went with the Carrier up,
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that in the Country lived,
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And for to leave this pretty Duck,
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I think no jot he grieved:
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For he his payment had indeed,
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although the Girl was weary,
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And she a Master got with speed,
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which made her blith and merry;
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Whereby it now appeareth plain,
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if that a Girl be undone
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She is quickly made whole again
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if she goes up to London.
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This Girl but a small time had been
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with this Man on a tryal,
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But her to wooe he did begin,
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and would have no denyal;
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But she having a nimble Wit,
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unto him thus replyed,
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And said, the Match it was not fit,
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his Sute must be denyed;
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And thus then by her flattering Speech,
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knowing that she was undone,
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By this Man was made whole again,
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when she came up to London.
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(Quoth she) I have in the Country
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great store of wealth and riches,
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And many for to wed with me,
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indeed their Fingers itches,
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Both Gentlemen and Tradesmen brave
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to me did sue for favour,
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And many a Youth my love did crave,
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but all have lost their labour:
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Amongst these Gallants good and bad,
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the best I might have chosen;
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For I great store of Suitors had,
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full thirteen to the dozen.
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A Goldsmith and a Mercer brave,
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a Silkman and a Draper,
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Three wealthy Heirs, young Gentlemen,
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the which could rant and vapor;
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A Feltmaker and a Shoemaker,
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a Glover, Weaver, and Taylor,
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A Tanner and a Currier,
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and a bold-hearted Saylor:
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But yet I loved the Saylor best,
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but for my Friend's displeasure,
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I had followed him from East to West,
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and served him at his pleasure.
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Yet still he followed on his Sute,
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and woo'd this Girl most stoutly,
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And she like to a Virgin mute,
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did stand it out devoutly.
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At last upon Conditions he
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the Fort from her obtain'd,
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And she surrendred quietly,
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whereby he profit gain'd:
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On these conditions both agreed,
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which you shall hear hereafter,
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When you the Articles do read,
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it then will cause some laughter.
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The Articles agreed upon, are these:
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Woman, You shall not go to law with my Father for
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my Portion. Man, I will not.
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Wom. You shall not call my Children Bastards to prove
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yourself a Cuckold. Man, Not I upon my honesty.
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Wom. You shall not be jealous if I go with another
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Man to drink a Cup of Sack.
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Man, Indeed Sweet-heart I hate such Thoughts.
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Wom. On this Condition, Hand and Heart
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I give to thee till Death us part.
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Man, And I will prove as true to thee,
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Come let us kiss and married be.
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The Articles being sealed indeed,
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the matter was so carried,
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A Priest they sent for with all speed,
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and so they both were married.
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But mark what after did betide,
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which caused the Man to wonder,
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At three days end his lusty Bride
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was strangely faln asunder;
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She had one Boy and eke a Girl
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which the Midwife brought unto him,
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Which made him scratch where it did not itch,
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and said it would undo him.
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The Midwife prayed him be content,
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his Bride was young and fair,
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You have no cause for to repent,
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you have a lusty Heir:
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There's some would give a thousand pound
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for such a Boy I tell ye,
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But such fruits are not in some found
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for want of a great Belly:
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Then pray come and love your Wife,
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and so be reconciled,
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You are not the first, upon my life,
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the which hath been beguiled.
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So straight he went into the Hall,
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and did salute each neighbour,
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And kindly drank unto them all,
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and thank'd them for their labour.
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In merryment he there did say,
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if all be Gold doth glister,
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My Wife has Land for her brave Boy,
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and Money for his Sister:
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For surely I must love her dear,
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she is both young and fair,
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And by her it doth appear,
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a very rich Man's Heir,
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To go into the Country both
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his Wife he oft intreated,
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At last she yields, but very loath,
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knowing that him she had cheated:
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But when that they came to her Dad,
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this jest is worth the telling,
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His House and Goods and all he had
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was scarce worth forty shilling;
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Her Friends on which she did so boast,
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good folks by Almes do cherish,
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And their poor House built at the cost
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and charges of the Parish.
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Said he, Are these your Friends indeed,
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where's your great Wealth and Treasure,
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I married you in hast and speed,
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but may repent at leisure.
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The Blind (I see) catch many a Flie,
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and I must be contented;
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For Marriage goes by Destiny:
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I can no way prevent it.
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And so to London back they go,
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having receiv'd no profit;
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The Articles do bind him so,
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he dares say nothing of it.
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You Shopkeepers and Tradesmen light,
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that live in London City,
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I do you all with Love invite
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to read this pleasant Ditty:
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Some Tradesmen to the Country sends
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bad Wares and broken Glasses,
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And Country Lads, to make amends,
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send them up broken Lasses:
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If a Country Girl do chance to dance,
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and by that Jig be undone,
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She quickly is made whole again
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by some Tradesmen in London.
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So to conclude my merry Jest,
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the which is worth the reading,
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My love to you it is exprest;
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I wish you good proceeding
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Young Men and Maids of each degree,
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Widdowers and Widdows lusty,
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In perfect love, without flattery,
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be constant, true and trusty:
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So need you not for to complain
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like to some girls being undone,
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Nor seek to be made whole again
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by going up to London.
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