%ISOlat1; %ISOlat2; %ISOnum; %ISOpub; ]> HICKLEDY-PICKLEDY: / OR, / The Yorkshire Curates Complaint. P., T. University of California - Santa Barbara The Early Modern Center English Broadside Ballad Archive (EBBA) Director Patricia Fumerton Associate Director Carl G Stahmer ?-? Early Modern Center, University of California Santa Barbara Santa Barbara, CA 06/26/2021 36474

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Patricia Fumerton Early Modern Center - English Department University of California Santa Barbara, CA 93105 United States of America EMail: pfumer@english.ucsb.edu

R35088 1 Alas, poor Scholar, &c. [unknown] Alas, Poor Scholar, etc. HUsh, Poetasters, that abuse / Apollo, and blaspheme the Muse; British Library - Luttrell Editor none none none none Information in this section of the Source Description refers to the original ballad manuscript. 2: 97 HICKLEDY-PICKLEDY: / OR, / The Yorkshire Curates Complaint. HICKLEDY-PICKLEDY: OR, The Yorkshire Curate's Complaint. P., T. ?-?

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<seg n="1" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">HICKLEDY-PICKLEDY:</hi></seg> <seg n="2" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">OR,</hi></seg> <seg n="3" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">The Yorkshire Curates Complaint.</hi></seg> <lb/> <seg n="4" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">To the Tune of <hi rend="bold">Alas, poor Scholar,</hi> etc.</hi></seg>
HUsh, Poetasters, that abuse Apollo, and blaspheme the Muse; That (like the Senator of worth) Conceive, and yet bring nothing forth: Or, like that Lyon-seeming Ass, Who (in the name of Hudibras) Fool of his penny hath beguil'd, And plaid at Hot-cockles with Wild: Or like those Pamphleteers, who (last Week) Canted in tone of Prynne and Bastwick; Filling the Change with false Tradition Of Chelmsfords Vicar's Circumcision, Who lost his Tithes, (as Story tells) For he was Guelt of nothing else. Nor need we Gouty Doctor's Tongue, Who got a Pars'nage for a Song; Chirping in phrase of Robert Wisdome, But since the first of August is dumb: Whose Antler fair as Chimny-stock, Whose Cheeks as smoothe as Punching-block; Whose Shanks like Dog-horse Farsie-legs, Whose Teeth like Crispins Holly-pegs, And Leather-ears, were all Retainers To the Right Worshipful Cordwainers: And besides this, his Noping Pate That speaks him famous Huson's Mate, (This in the Church, that in the State, Did Text as well as Shooes translate) We scorn. Now fie of his unsav'ry Drolls, With which he Flie-blow'd Bumpkins Souls. But if the vertue of Small-Beer, Christ'nings, and Twenty Marks a year, Can brain with Fancy rich inspire, And teach an Ass to tune a Lyre, Who felt for Poetry, but mist her, Laying his Clutches on her Sister Hight Poverty: and since that time, Borrow'd in Prose, and paid in Rime:
Then listen, Lordlings, unto one At Gossipings yclep'd Sir John; Who is no better nor no worse Then Lazy Doctor's Stalking-horse; The Lazy Priest, who (like to Criple) Supports each Arm with Crutch of Steeple; And (when his crazy bulk grows sick) Stumbles into a Bishoprick. Religious man! who more condoles The want of Tithes, then loss of Souls; And when both Men and Corn are mown, Seeks not Gods Harvest, but his own: Who plays with Simoniack Doxy, And in the Pulpit speaks by Proxy; Whilst Curate Poor, that bears the heat Of Morning, and the Evening sweat; And doth his Congregation foster With Postles Creed, and Pater Noster; Dispensing (in these times of dotage) That which blind Sectaries call Pottage; Is Slave to Avaritious Master, For Rector rides on back of Pastor. Had I been Presbyter, perhaps I might have wash'd my Zealous Chaps With blood of Grape, and left the County To taste th' unconstant City's Bounty; And (as to Calamy it happens) Been strange Decoy-bird to dead Capons. Thus might I graze (like Royal Beast) And never taste the Wisemans Feast: But tedious is the Curate's way, For he must Fast as well as Pray: But if the Parliament will smother One Priest with Cures, and starve another, The Tott'ring Clergy must submit To Presbyter or Jesuit: For Liturgy will loose her Glory 'Twixt Mass-book and the Directory.
By T.P.