%ISOlat1; %ISOlat2; %ISOnum; %ISOpub; ]> The Skilful Doctor of Glocester-shire: / OR, / A new way to take Physick. / This ditty doth concern a Country Farmer, / Who lay with his maid, not thinking to harm her, / But she, poor Wench, was by her Master vild, / First tempt to sin, then after got with Child: / But by the Doctors skill, her honest dame, / Excus'd her Husband, and sav'd her maid from blame, / The Doctor he hath medic[i]nes in store, / To Cure all sorts of folks, both rich and poor. University of California - Santa Barbara The Early Modern Center English Broadside Ballad Archive (EBBA) Director Patricia Fumerton Associate Director Carl G Stahmer 1689-1689 Early Modern Center, University of California Santa Barbara Santa Barbara, CA 10/02/2018 35950

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Patricia Fumerton Early Modern Center - English Department University of California Santa Barbara, CA 93105 United States of America EMail: pfumer@english.ucsb.edu

R184266 1 Beds making [unknown] Beds Making A Country Farmer, as 'tis said, / That had a pritty handsome Maid, Information in this section of the Source Description refers to the original ballad manuscript. : The Skilful Doctor of Glocester-shire: / OR, / A new way to take Physick. / This ditty doth concern a Country Farmer, / Who lay with his maid, not thinking to harm her, / But she, poor Wench, was by her Master vild, / First tempt to sin, then after got with Child: / But by the Doctors skill, her honest dame, / Excus'd her Husband, and sav'd her maid from blame, / The Doctor he hath medic[i]nes in store, / To Cure all sorts of folks, both rich and poor. The Skilful Doctor of Glocester-shire: OR, A new way to take Physick. This ditty doth concern a Country Farmer, Who lay with his maid, not thinking to harm her, But she, poor Wench, was by her Master vild, First tempt to sin, then after got with Child: But by the Doctors skill, her honest dame, Excus’d her husband, and sav’d her maid from blame, The Doctor he hath medic[i]nes in store, To Cure all sorts of folks, both rich and poor. The Skillful Doctor of Gloucester-shire: OR, A new way to take Physic. This ditty doth concern a Country Farmer, Who lay with his maid, not thinking to harm her, But she, poor Wench, was by her Master defiled, First tempted to sin, then after got with Child: But by the Doctor's skill, her honest dame, Excused her Husband, and saved her maid from blame, The Doctor he hath medicines in store, To Cure all sorts of folks, both rich and poor. 1689-1689 W. Thackeray, J. Millet, and A. Milbourn

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 Early Modern Center Ballad Project Keyword Taxonomy advice affliction / health alcohol Americas animals / nature Bible / biblical figures buildings / architecture catastrophe children class clothing / appearance country / nation crime death economics / commerce entertainments family Featured folklore gender holidays / seasons infidelity labor / craft law London love maritime marriage military / war monstrosity mythology / Classical news nobility / court politics / government procreation punishment race / ethnicity religious concepts religious figures religious groups royalty rural life servitude sex / sexuality supernatural / magic travel trickery / deceit urban life vice violence virtue vulgar humor youth / age Library of Congress Subject Heading Taxonomy 10/2/2018 Santa Barbara, California, United States of America affliction / health family marriage sex / sexuality trickery / deceit Ballads, English 17th century Broadsides, England 17th century 10/2/2018 1:09:07 PM XBallad Messner, Milena Created XML Version of Ballad 10/2/2018 1:09:07 PM Transcription Supervisor McCants, Kristen Transcription of ballad manuscript 10/2/2018 1:09:07 PM Double-Key Comparison and Merging Adkison, Katie Transcription of ballad manuscript 10/2/2018 1:09:07 PM Transcriptionist Two Abrams, Annie Transcription of ballad manuscript 10/2/2018 1:09:07 PM Transcriptionist One Ward, Jayne Transcription of ballad manuscript 9/20/2018 Checker Jessica Zisa Edited Ballad Catalogue Record 8/7/2018 Checker Minh Hua Edited Ballad Catalogue Record 5/16/2018 Checker Kristen McCants Edited Ballad Catalogue Record 5/16/2018 Checker Kristen McCants Edited Ballad Catalogue Record 11/7/2016 Bibliographer Rachel LevinsonEmley Initial Ballad Catalogue Record Created
<seg n="1" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">The Skilful Doctor of <hi rend="bold">Glocester-shire:</hi></hi></seg> <seg n="2" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">OR,</hi></seg> <seg n="3" rend="left"><hi rend="italic"><hi rend="bold">A new way to take Physick.</hi></hi></seg> <lb/> <seg n="4" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">This ditty doth concern a Country Farmer,</hi></seg> <seg n="5" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">Who lay with his maid, not thinking to harm her,</hi></seg> <seg n="6" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">But she, poor Wench, was by her Master vild,</hi></seg> <seg n="7" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">First tempt to sin, then after got with Child:</hi></seg> <seg n="8" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">But by the Doctors skill, her honest dame,</hi></seg> <seg n="9" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">Excus'd her husband, and sav'd her maid from blame,</hi></seg> <seg n="10" rend="indent"><hi rend="italic">The Doctor he hath medic[i]nes in store,</hi></seg> <seg n="11" rend="indent"><hi rend="italic">To Cure all sorts of folks, both rich and poor.</hi></seg> <lb/> <seg n="12" rend="left"><hi rend="italic">The Tune is,</hi> Beds making.</seg>
A Country Farmer, as 'tis said, That had a pritty handsome Maid, He askt her a question secretly, To which she answered, by and by: And being kindly reconcil'd, The Farmer got his Maid with-Child. And after he had done the deed, His heart poor man did almost bleed; With inward grief and trembling fear, Doubting his Wife should of it hear: The Maid did likewise sigh and groan, And to her Master made great moan. Wherefore all dangers to prevent, Unto a poor young-man he went, Saying, ten pounds he would him give, And [be a Friend while he did] live, [So thou wilt finish up my strife, And take my maid to be thy Wife. The Young man thus to him replyd, Your suit to me must be denyd; For I will neither Reap nor Mow, The Bastard Seed that you did sow, Get a workman where you can quod he, For I your Hireling will not be. The Farmer being thus deny'd, Another practice soon he try'd: There was a Doctor he knew well.]
That three miles from his house did dwel Unto this Doctor he told all, That did of late to him befall. The Doctor answered him, and told, If you'l give me ten pounds in Gold, I'le teach you such a pritty trick, I'm sure you never heard the like: To save your Maid and you from blame, And your Wife shall yield unto the same To this the Farmer soon agreed, And down he laid ten pounds with speed, The Money pleas'd the Doctor well, Who straight his Money began to tell, Mark well what I shall say, quoth he, And learn this Counsel now of me. With speed run home and tell your wife, That you shall surely lose your life, By reason of a grievous pain, That in your belly doth remain: [There is no way but you must die, Unless you seek some remedy. Pray her with all the speed may be, To bring your water unto me: And when she comes let me alone Ile shew such a skill as ne'r was shown Such stories Ile to her unfold, The like strange news was never told.]
I Will perswade her thus, and say, Last time that you together lay, The Moon it was Eclipsed strange, And nature did her courses change; Mars by Dame Venus was beguil'd, And so your wife got you with Child. This bargain made, brought much content Home in all haste the Farmer went; And told his Wife so strange a tale, As made her countenance look pale: Dear wife, quoth he, I am perplext, Never was man befor so vext. I am incumbered with great pains, From top to toe, through all my veins; My back and sides grieve me so sore, Such pains I never felt before: But yet the greatest pain I tell ye, Lies rumbling up and down my belly. Husband, quoth she, I can you tell, Of one that soon can make you well He cures, as I do understand, All diseases that he takes in hand; And if you please to have it so, I'le to him with your Water go. Next morning with a good intent, The good-wife to the Doctor went; And shews to him her Husbands water, Now mark the jest that follows after: Cox-body, quoth she the Doctor mild, Thy Husband surely is with-Child. The woman she was much amaz[d,] And on the Doctor strangely [gazd,] Good Sir, in kindness now [tell me,] How such things in a [man may be,] I will, quoth he, [make you no doubt,] A[nd time at last will bring all out. When Luna last was in the Clips, You with your Husband joyned lips, Then Jupiter being wrapt in thunder Turn'd Venus up, while Mars lay under By which Conjunction well I wot, Your Husband then with child you got.]
Alas, alas, then said his wife IIS there no means to save his life? I would not for a thousand pound. My husband he should fall to th' ground; Faith quoth the Doctor, there is none, No ways to save his life but one. Kind loving Sir, then answered she, If you will be so good to me, To tell how I his life may save, I'le give whatever you will have: No cost nor pains that I will spare, To save his life whom I love so dear: But first, quoth he, i'le have you swear, And also have a special care, To let nobody know while you live, What Physick he is to receive; She straightway bound it with an Oath, I'le keep your counsel by my troth. The Doctor's Potion of P[hysick.] Then mark me well wh[ats to be done] Each night 'bout sett[ing of the Sun,] His Supper then [you must provide,] Of Eggs and so[me choice meat beside,] And for to stre[ngthen his weak back,] You must giv[e him a Pint of Sack.] Which [being done put him to bed] And l[ay soft Pillows under his head;] Th[en make for him a Posset fine, With Sugar and sweet Muskadine, Commixt with Cinnamon and Mace, And let him swallow it down apace. When he hath slept an hour or twain, Then you must come to him again, And bring with you a lusty Maid, Which to his Belly must be laid, So let them merrily sleep together, And lovingly embrace each other. This course you must for three Weeks take And then be sure that it will make The pain go from his bad and side, The Maid the torment shall abide, And afterward in little space, She will bring forth a Babe of Grace.]
And when your Maid is brought to Bed, Yourself must lye down in her stead; And because nothing must be known, Folks must believe the Child's your own Besure you take this course said he, And so your Husband eas'd shall be. The woman having heard this news, Ran home in haste, how could she [chuss] Where she did see her Husband [lie,] Like one just ready for to d[ye:] Then presently she did [unfold] All that the Doctor had h[er told.] Alas, quoth he, [such pangs I have,] There is [no means my life to save,] Unless, [you do Posset make] T[o cure my belly of the ake: Wherefore the Woman out of hand Did as the Doctor did command. A Supper of most dainty meat, She made him ready for to eat, And because he should no Physick lack, She after Supper gave him Sack, Then kept him warm within his bed, And with sweet Posset she him fed. This being done with Cupids aid, She got the good will of her Maid, To lie with and keep her Master warm And said he should do her no harm; The Maid at first seemd loath to do, But at the last yielded thereunto. And as the Doctor did fore-tell, So everything in order fell, The Maid in time was brought to Bed, The good-wife lay down in her stead The man was of his burden easd, The Child at Nurse, & all are pleasd. You that these Verses hear or read, If of the Doctor you stand in need, Enquire him out where he doth dwell, And surely he will use you well, Hel give you Physick to your mind, So that your Purse be well lind.] [?]