%ISOlat1; %ISOlat2; %ISOnum; %ISOpub; ]> Dead and Alive./ This Ditty out of Glocester=shire was sent,/ To London for to have it put in PRINT: / Therefore draw near, and listen unto this,/ It doth concern a man that did amiss,/ And so to shun the anger of his Wife,/ He thought with poyson for to end his life:/ But in the stead of poyson he drank Sack,/ For which his Wife did soundly pay his Back. Price, Lawrence University of California - Santa Barbara The Early Modern Center Director Patricia Fumerton 1684-1686 Early Modern Center, University of California Santa Barbara Santa Barbara, CA 08/14/2007 21782

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Patricia Fumerton Early Modern Center - English Department University of California Santa Barbara, CA 93105 United States of America EMail: pfumer@english.ucsb.edu

4.118 R182060 1 Old-Flesh Old-Flesh Old-Flesh THere was a Shaving Royster,/ as I heard many tell, author from Wing and Rollins Pepys 4.118 Wing P3357A; Rollins (2) ?494 (March 12, 1656, ii, 34, Fran. Grove); Rollins (2) 493 (March 1, 1675, ii, 499) Pepys Library The Pepys ballads : facsimile volume Editor W.G. Day D.S. Brewer Cambridge [England] 1987 Information in this section of the Source Description refers to the original ballad manuscript. 4: 118 Dead and Alive./ This Ditty out of Glocester=shire was sent,/ To London for to have it put in PRINT: / Therefore draw near, and listen unto this,/ It doth concern a man that did amiss,/ And so to shun the anger of his Wife,/ He thought with poyson for to end his life:/ But in the stead of poyson he drank Sack,/ For which his Wife did soundly pay his Back. Dead and Alive. This Ditty out of Glocester-shire was sent, To London for to have it put in PRINT: Therefore draw near, and listen unto this, It doth concern a man that did amiss, And so to shun the anger of his Wife, He thought with poyson for to end his life: But in the stead of poyson he drank Sack, For which his Wife did soundly pay his Back. Dead and Alive. This Song out of Gloustershire was Sent, to London for to Have It Put in Print: Therefore Draw Near, and Listen Unto This, It Does Concern a Man that Did Amiss, and so to Shun the Anger of His Wife, He Thought with Poison for to End His Life: But in the Stead of Poison He Drank Canary Wine, for which His Wife Did Soundly Pay His Back. Price, Lawrence 1/2 sheet oblong folio, 198 x 330 cropped right edge, damaged surface, uneven inking, set-off from opposite page visible vertical rule 1684-1686 Printed for J. C. W. T. and T. P[.] J.C., W.T., T.P. Blagden

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 Taxonomy used by Pepys to Organize Ballads in Albums A Small Promiscuous Supplement Devotion & Morality Drinking & Good Fellowship History - True & Fabulous Humour, Frollicks &c Love Pleasant Love Pleasant and Unfortunate Love Unfortunate Marriage Sea State & Times Tragedy Various Subjects Early Modern Center Ballad Project Keyword Taxonomy advice affliction/health alcohol animals/nature appearance Bible/biblical figures buildings/architecture catastrophe children class clothing/fashion country/nation crime death economics/trade entertainment family/procreation folklore gender historical figures & events holidays/seasons infidelity law London love maritime marriage military/war monstrosity mythology/Classical world news nobility/court politics/government punishment religious concepts religious figures religious types & sects royalty rural life servitude sex/sexuality supernatural/magic The New World travel trickery/deceit urban life vice violence virtue vulgarities/crass humor Library of Congress Subject Heading Taxonomy 8/14/2007 Santa Barbara, California, United States of America Marriage alcohol animals/nature death marriage rurallife trickery/deceit 08/14/07 Checker Rachel Mann Transcription checked, Metadata added, XML created 12/03/06 Transcriber Jessica Murphy Original Transcription 10/20/2004 Bibliographer Liberty Stanavage Bibliographic SQL Database Record Created
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THere was a Shaving Royster, as I heard many tell, In Michaels Deans fair Forrest, in Glocester-shire did dwell; Some call'd him William Wiseman, but in that they were too blame: Some call'd him Leonard Lackwit, but that was not his name; His name was Simple Simon, as it is well approv'd, And amongst his Friends and Kinsfolks he dearly was belov'd; He capor'd and he vapored, and liv'd a merry life, But yet good man at all times he could not rule his Wife. His Wife she was a Woman, that lov'd a cup of Sack, And she would tipple soundly, behind her Husbands back
A bottle she had gotten, that would hold two quarts, or more Well fil'd with Wine she hang'd it behind her Chamber door; And she told unto her Husband, that it was poyson strong, And bad him not to touch it, for fear of doing wrong, If thou drink but one drop on't, (quoth she) 'twill cost thy life; Therefore in time take heed, and be ruled vy thy wife. This Simon's wife had plenty, of fatting Hogs and Pigs, With Geese, Ducks, Hens and Turkies, that laid great store of Eggs; Both Sheep, and such like Cattel, fine Ews and pretty Lambs, Which up and down the Forrest, did feed and suck their Dams, She put trust unto her Husband, to look unto them all, To keep them safe from danger; now mark what did befall: He did his best endeavour, to shun all kind of strife, And yet through strange misfortune he could not please his wife. One morning she sent him, to field to keep her Sheep, And charg'd him to be watchful, and take heed he did not sl[e]ep A piece of bread and butter, she gave him in his hand; Whereby she made him promise to do as she did command: But see what happened to him, when he came to the field; He fell a sleep while Foxes, three of his Lambs had kill'd: This bred a great Dissention, and raised a world of strife, Till Simon for his fault, had begg'd pardon of his Wife.
ANother day she sent him, her Ducks and Geese to tend, And charg'd him on her blessing, he would no more offend; Her Goslings and her Chickings, with him she put in trust, Who took a stick and told them, so they were twenty just; But a woful chance befel to poor Simon before night, For seven of his best Chickens, were took prisoners by the Kite, This vexed him and it made him, half weary of his life, For he knew not what answee, to make unto his Wife. Next morning when that Simon was sent to milk the cow, Another strange mishap there was done him by the Sows For whilst that he was driving the little Pigs away, The Sow came in the dairy-house, and swigg'd up all the whey: The Cheese out of the Cheese-fat. she did both tare and haul, And threw down the Cream pot and made an end of all: Wherewith she burst her belly. and so she lost her life, And poor Simon knew not what answer, to make unto his wife. When as his wife came in the dary-house, and saw what there was done, A strong and fierce encounter she presently begun; She pull'd him by the ears. and she wrung him by the Nose. And she kickt him on the belly, while the tears run down his hose, And she vow'd to be revenged, before to morrow day, For all her brood of chickens, which the Kite had carryed away: Poor Simon stood amazed, being weary of his Life, For he poor man was tired, with his unruly wife. For when that he perceived his Wife in such a rage, Not knowing how nor which way her fury to asswage; He cunningly got from her, and to the chamber went,
Thinking himself to poyson; for that was his intent; So coming to the bottle, which I speak of before, He thought it to be poyson, which hung behind the door; He vow'd to drink it all up and end his wretched Life, Rather than live in thraldom, with such a cursed Wife. So opening of a window which stood towards the south, He took the bottle of sack, and put it to his mouth; Now will I drink this poyson, (quoth he) with all my heart: So that the first draught he drank on't; he swallowed near a quart; The second time that he set the Bottle to his snout, He never left swigging, till he had suckt all out: Which done he fell down backward, like one bereft of life, Crying out, I now am poysoned, by means of my curs'd Wife. (Quoth he) I feel the Poyson, now run through every vein, It rumbles in my belly, and tickles in my brain; It wambles in my stomach, and it mollifies my heart, It pierceth through my members, and yet I feel no smart; Would all that have curst wives would example take hereby: For I dye as sweet a death sure, as ever any man did dye; Tis better with such poyson to end a wretched life, Then to live, and be tormented with such a wicked Wife. Now see what followed after, his wife by chance did walk, And coming by the window, she heard her Simon talk; And thinking on her bottle, she up stairs did run, And came into the Chamber, to see what he had done; When as she saw her Husband lye drunk upon his back, And the bottle lying by him; but never a drop of sack
I am poyson'd I am poyson'd, (quoth he) long of my wife, I hope I shall be at quiet, now I have lost my life. Pox take you are you poysoned, (quoth she) I now will strive, And do my best endeavour to make you run alive; With that a quil of powder she blew up in his nose, Then like a man turn'd antick he presently arose: So down the stairs he run strait, into the open street, With hooping and hollowing, to all that he did meet: And with a loud voice cryed out, I am raised from death to life, By vertue of a powder that was given me by my wife. Some folks that did behold him, were in a grievous fear, For seeing of a mad man, they durst not him come near: He leaped and he skipped, throw fair and throw foul, Whilst the people gaz'd on him, like pies upon an Owl: His Wife she followed after, thorow thick and thorow thin, And with a basting Cudgel. she soundly bang'd his skin: And thus poor Simon cryed out, I am raised from death to life, By vertue of a powder that was given me by my Wife. At last a friend of Simons which was to him some kin, By fair and kind perswasions, open'd the door and let him in He sent for Simons Wife and so made them both good friends, Who kindly kist each other, and to all discord ends: The Neighbours all rejoyced, to see them thus agreed, And like a loving Couple, to bed they went with speed: No doubt but Simple Simon, that night well pleased his Wife, For ever since that time he hath liv'd a quiet Life.
Printed for J.C. W.T. and T.P[.]